Day 133 of my Texas prison camp. I've been completely restricted from utilizing my gaming headset for RO and other gaming activities. Can't build my Gundam model because I don't want to have to deal with figuring out how to transport it back to California in one piece. I've been at least allowed to continue doing art commissions so that's something.
I had full intentions to move back to California at the end of February, but for some reason my family insists that I give it at least another 2 months. Which has then been extended to summer. I never wanted to be here and now I'm stuck here and restricted from partaking in my stress-relieving activities. The freedom I was supposed to have here in Texas was a farce. I feel trapped. I don't want to be in Texas, but I'm not allowed to return to California. Should've known my older sister's offer was too good to be true. Fool me once.
She keeps grilling me and putting me on the spot and wonders why I shut down when she does that. "What are your plans when you move back to California?" "How are you going to get by without a job?" "When are you going to be an adult?"
Well sorry if I don't have my entire life planned out to every little detail. I thought I was getting by fine working at Disneyland and doing art commissions on the side. I know my art skills aren't good enough to get me a lot of money; I've already accepted that my dream job of being a character designer is always going to be just that, a dream. No one's ever going to hire me for my mediocre art skills and anyone who thinks otherwise is more foolish than they realize.
Would it be nice if my original Biology major/Digital Arts minor plan at the University of California, Irvine had panned out so I would be a veterinarian who does art on the side? Well yeah, but too bad chemistry kicked my butt to high heaven so that plan of mine was shot down big time. Which then caused me to switch to my Studio Art major/Digital Arts minor back-up plan, but on the bright side I discovered a passion for 2D animation I never realized I had. Lot of good that's doing for me in the job market, though. >_<
My mom and older sister keep insisting that I apply for receptionist or corporate jobs since they pay a lot, but I'm just not the kind of person who sits around doing office work for hours and hours. I'm the kind of worker that likes to get her hands dirty and be active; manual labor kind of stuff. (Good free workout, too!) I already sit around a lot when working on my art, I don't want a job that makes me do more of that. C'mon.
My ideal kind of life would encompass a good-paying job that allows me time to learn and train in kung fu while doing art commissions on the side. If I can get to that point, I think I'd be pretty content. Too bad my family would consider that a stupid life that's not "normal." Sigh.
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